I'm Still Here
by Orcagirl2001
Summary: A Yahiko Songfic - This is my first song fic about poor little Yahiko. Don't tell him i called him little


I'm Still Here  
  
A Yahiko songfic  
  
By Orcagirl2001  
  
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Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin. All praise shall go to Nobuhiro Watsuki! ^^ This song fic is completely based after the happenings in the RK manga volume in which Yahiko makes his first appearance. All I did was describe everything that happened. Hope you like it. Please Read and Review!  
  
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I sat hidden behind a pair of juniper bushes just beyond the edge of the wooden bridge leading out of town. Just over the hill I could see my next prey. Walking on the bridge were a woman wearing a swordsman's uniform, a bokken, and knapsack, and a man with long red hair and a Japanese sword clinking against his hip. My grubby hands clenched as I prepared to make my move. After looking over my shoulder to make sure no policemen were nearby, I rushed out onto the bridge and tackled the swordsman from behind. Swiftly I reached into his belt pouch and took his wallet, which jingled with coppers. However, my escaped was foiled by the woman, who pinned me down, taking the wallet from my stubborn grip.  
  
"Kenshin, this kid's a pickpocket!" she yapped. "This is your wallet, yeah?"  
  
Face down on the cold and clammy planks I grumbled angrily and forced my head up. Glaring at the woman, I snapped, "Let go of me, ugly!"  
  
She grabbed the front of my yukata and snarled, "What? Who're you calling ugly, stupid?!"  
  
"You, ugly!" I growled back, gritting my teeth and thinking hard about spitting in her face.  
  
Suddenly, the swordsman stepped forward and took his wallet from the woman's hand. I noticed he had a cross-shaped scar on his cheek. He had been in a hard battle long ago but it seemed strange because his face was so kind. He took the lady's hand off me and placed his purse in my hands.  
  
"Young one," he said softly. "Don't get caught next time." My eyes widened in surprise at his actions but before I could say anything he had taken the lady's things and started walking back down the bridge with the woman trailing behind.  
  
My heart filled with rage at the swordsman and I strangled the wallet with my fits. How dare he insult me like that? Hatefully I threw it hard at the swordsman's head, knocking him into a stupor, stood tall and shouted, "I am not a young one! I am Yahiko Myojin-Tokyo Samurai! I haven't fallen far enough to be pitied by strangers!"  
  
The swordsman looked rather surprised while the lady he was traveling with looked like she wanted to punch my face in. I had no fear of them. "I was just testing you because you had a sword! Don't get the wrong idea!"  
  
The swordsman smiled kindly and started to say, "Young one-"  
  
Even more riled by his lack of respect I shouted back ,"I am not a young one!"  
  
"You look like a child," he continued, his face plastered with a stupidly kind grin. "But it's obvious that your soul is mature. Sorry. Didn't mean to underestimate you."  
  
His words hit me like a flying bullet. My soul. I couldn't understand how a man like him could say such things. No one I had met in the last few years gave me any respect or credit, everyone except for him. My soul...Too proud to admit my gratitude, even through outward expression, I turned on my heels and ran back from whence I came, empty-handed.  
  
~~~  
  
I am a question to the world,  
  
Not an answer to be heard.  
  
All a moment that's held in your arms.  
  
And what do you think you'd ever say?  
  
I don't listen anyway:  
  
You ignore me,  
  
And I'll never be what you want me to be.  
  
~~~  
  
Alone on the banks of the river, I watched the sun glowing blood red in the west, silhouettes of the nearby town standing like shadows against the evening sky. I couldn't get those words, uttered by the kind swordsman, out of my head. How could he make such a judgment in such a short time? There was definitely something different about him. Maybe I've gone down the wrong path...maybe I've made a huge mistake.  
  
From behind me I heard footsteps approaching. It was about the right time of day. I knew they wouldn't be late. They never were.  
  
"Hey there he is," a half-drunk voice spoke.  
  
Two men stepped in front of me, the first being Gasuke, a second-rank gang leader, with tall hair and a sword. The other man was plain with no weapon but his reeking rice-wine breath. The drunken man stooped down to me and said, "We had to go looking for you, Yahiko." He stuck out his hand, "The month's payment is due. Better give it up."  
  
I glared at him and his greedy hand and said, "Forget it."  
  
The man seemed surprised, as he should be.  
  
"No more stealing," I stated firmly. "I cut my ties to you gangsters as of today."  
  
I saw the shadow of the Gasuke grow large. Suddenly everything when white as I felt a harsh blow to the back of my head. The hits kept coming, I curled up tight to shield myself, but uttered no cry. This happened often enough for me to resist the pain. It was over in a matter of moments, though if it wasn't for his drunken companion, he would have beaten me dead.  
  
"Don't talk crazy, eh?" I could barely hear his edgy voice past the pounding echoing in my ears. "What're you trying to pull?"  
  
Slowly I tried to stand. I couldn't lay there like a weak victim, not around him. I had to prove I was stronger than him. I could barely make out the pool of blood beneath where my face had laid, blinded by the angry tears swimming in my eyes. I could show no fear. "Nothing," I breathed.  
  
The words of the red-haired swordsman echoed from my mind. His kind voice and smile saying, "You look like a child but it's obvious that your soul is mature."  
  
"Your soul..."  
  
It was true. I deserved better than to stoop to the level of criminals. I am the son of a samurai, not some lowly pick pocket making a living by stealing from others. I knew it was wrong. "I'm just sick of being a thief."  
  
Not even a moment after the words slipped through my bloody lips I felt Gasuke's foot slam down on my head. Black dirt shot into my nose, caking onto the blood on my face. I felt myself falling unconscious. I heard his raspy voice fading out as he said, spitefully, "You've always been a punk. I don't like punks. Time to show you who the boss is."  
  
I growled internally at his words but could do nothing for everything went black.  
  
~~~  
  
And what do you think you'd understand?  
  
I'm a boy, not a man.  
  
You can take me and throw me away.  
  
And how can you learn what's never shown?  
  
Yeah, you stand here all alone.  
  
They don't know me 'cause I'm not here.  
  
~~~  
  
Back at the gang house I was brought before the leader, Tanishi, who sat in the back of the room, on a platform, eating his fill. Gasuke was on me within seconds, beating me with his sword hilt and kicking me in the gut. I vomited blood onto the tatami, Gasuke hovering over me, ready to strike again at any moment.  
  
"Stubborn punk," he sneered, lifting me high by my yukata collar. "All you gotta say is you're sorry."  
  
All the other gang members present agreed with the tall haired bully, but the leader thought otherwise. "Ease up for a minute, Gasuke, or there will be nothing left to apologize."  
  
I knew better than to think he was being kind. His piggish voice continued in a somewhat casual lecture, "Yahiko, how do you think you're going to live if you quit thieving? If you think you'll be fine somehow because you're of samurai descent, then you're wrong. This new world of ours is all about money. Pride isn't worth anything. When samurai hang onto their pride, it only pulls them down deeper. The brothels are overflowing with the wives and daughters of 'proud' samurai. And whenever a gang of bandits is caught you know who they were in former life. It's pitiful."  
  
I could not keep myself from glaring at him with spiteful fire. How dare he tell such lies. Samurai were considered honorable and noble men, who deserved praise from all. I did not want to hear about this new era, I did not want to hear of greed and stealing. I would take my pride to the grave if it meant keeping the honor of the samurai alive.  
  
"Forget this 'noble lineage', Yahiko. Learn to live a humble life." He concluded, smiling ever so slightly, knowing that his bribes might be effective. "Then I'll take you in. Tanishi's man...that's something to be proud of."  
  
No bribe could change how I felt, not for a second. He was asking me to something I was unable to do, to trade my heritage for something dirty: the life of a thief. "Don't make me repeat it: I decline."  
I saw the blows coming even before I said those words, but I took every hit like a man.  
  
"Who are you spittin' at? The boss who took care of you since your parents died?" one man demanded.  
  
"You dog!" another yelled.  
  
"Don't lie to yourself," Gasuke snarled, cutting into the fighting. "You call yourself a samurai, but what did your dad ever have? Three acres and two servants! And then the moron tried to fight the revolution and got himself killed!"  
  
My eyes lit up with the very fires of the underworld. How dare he speak of my father in such a way.  
  
"Your mother had to sell her body in a brothel and died of syphilis! Which do you take after? The fool or the whore?"  
  
"SHUT UP!" I screamed, unable to take any more. Too weak to stand, I attacked the only place I knew where he would really get the point. He fell back in agony but I was not finished. I balled my fists, ignoring the pain that coursed through my body and shouted, "My father died faithful to his Lord, opposing a revolution that he knew was immoral. My mother worked to put food on my table, to raise me well, until it killed her. They lived and died as samurai! I won't forgive anyone who insults them!"  
  
~~~  
  
And I want a moment to be real,  
  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
  
And how can the world want me to change,  
  
They're the ones that stay the same.  
  
The don't know me,  
  
'Cause I'm not here.  
  
~~~  
  
"I'm the one that won't forgive punk," Gasuke threatened, bringing his sword out into the light. "I'm gonna kill y-"  
  
Suddenly as he rose up and prepared to strike me down, the wall to his left shattered and a blur of red and silver came rushing into the room, slamming Gasuke to the ground. Everyone was stunned to see the striking form of a swordsman with long red hair and a cross-shaped scar on his left cheek, standing on the crushed form of Gasuke. I was shocked to see it was the very swordsman I had met on the bridge, who had spoken those words to me, of how my soul was greater than he had expected.  
  
Tanishi panicked and shouted, "It's a raid! Get the guys!" thinking that the swordsman was here for the booty stored away.  
  
"They won't come. They weren't going to let me in, so I had them go to sleep for a little while." His eyes, so much different from before. No longer did he look like some wimpy guy carrying around a sword. He bore the face of a warrior, his eyes glinting with the heat of battle. "I am Himura Kenshin, a rurouni. I've come for the young one."  
  
But how? How did he know?  
  
~~~  
  
And you see the things they never see  
  
All you wanted, I could be  
  
Now you know me, and I'm not afraid  
  
And I wanna tell you who I am  
  
Can you help me be a man?  
  
They can break me  
  
As long as I know who I am  
  
~~~  
  
"What are you, another samurai fool?" Gasuke shouted, knocking the broken doors off of him and lunging toward Kenshin with his sword. "I kill you both at once!"  
  
Kenshin was too swift. Within a breath's moment the red-haired rurouni had blasted Gasuke into the ceiling, where he hung like a dead man.  
  
"We're talking," he said calmly, placing his sword over his shoulder. "Just stay there and be quiet for a while."  
  
He turned to the leader, Tanishi, and said coolly, "What do you say? Show your generosity and release the young one. It may embarrass you less than the total annihilation of your gang."  
  
His eyes bore right through Tanishi, who sat there shivering and sweating like a terrified rat before a fierce and deadly tiger. I couldn't believe the danger in his eyes, the thick desire for blood. This guy was no ordinary swordsman. I believe Tanishi figured that out quite soon.  
  
"Fine, go ahead and take him," the leader squeaked in a most undignified way. Then again he was never dignified in the first place, just a greedy pig caring for nothing except the jingle of coppers. I hated that man.  
  
"Thank you," the rurouni said, calmly slipping his sword back into its sheath. "Please forgive the intrusion." He then turned to me, his expression returning to the kind man I had met on the bridge and said, "Are you all right, young one?" He put out his hand to help me to my feet. "You were hard to pinpoint, but after visiting one yakuza group after another..."  
  
I slapped his hand away from me, my anger swelling. How dare he help me. I never asked for any help, I never had before. Samurai fight their battles alone. It made me so angry. He just stared at me with that stupid expression which made me furious. "Who told you to help me? I could have fought them alone! I could have fought!"  
  
"Of course," he smiled softly, trying to ease my prideful spite against him. "This one has underestimated you once again."  
  
I could say nothing. Again he had amazed me with his swordsmanship and with his words. How could I stand up against power like that? Even though I was free, I didn't know how much more trouble I would run into. There were probably worse men out there than these that I would face in the future. Would I favor against them? No...I am but a boy wielding nothing more than his pride.  
  
"Then," Seeing that my mind had wandered, the swordsman to the opportunity to snatch me away, carrying me by the back of my shirt. "As an apology, at least allow your wounds to be treated." He walked out of the room and started down the hallway. It was littered with the bodies of the guards who lined the house. It stunned me to see such power coming from one man. If only I had that kind of power. If only...  
  
~~~  
  
And I want a moment to be real,  
  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
  
And how can the world want me to change,  
  
They're the ones that stay the same.  
  
They can't see me,  
  
But I'm still here.  
  
~~~  
  
I cursed that place in which I had spent so many years suffering. I cursed those men lying there for beating me up for the one thing I cherished. I cursed the leader for being so cruel. I cursed the swordsman, Kenshin, for coming to my aid. And I cursed myself for not being strong enough to defend myself and what I believed in. I let the hot tears run down my face, tears I had kept inside for so long. I was glad that he couldn't see me cry.  
  
~~~  
  
They can't tell me who to be,  
  
'Cause I'm not what they see.  
  
And the world is still sleepin',  
  
While I keep on dreamin' for me.  
  
And they'll want to just whispers,  
  
And lies that I'll never believe.  
  
~~~  
  
"Are you that bothered by your lack of power, young one?" the swordsman asked, concern echoing in his voice.  
  
I cursed that kind voice. "I want to be strong. So strong I won't need your help. Strong enough to defend my father and mother's pride on my own."  
  
I wept at my failure. I prayed for strength. I had prayed every night to face the evils that came upon me each day, only to keep on failing. If only I were like the swordsman, strong, able to face any challenge without so much as breaking a sweat. If I had that power, I could live the life of a true samurai.  
  
As if he truly understood what I was going through, the swordsman whispered softly, "Of course."  
  
~~~  
  
And I want a moment to be real,  
  
Wanna touch things I don't feel,  
  
Wanna hold on and feel I belong.  
  
And how can the world want me to change,  
  
They're the ones that stay the same.  
  
I'm the one now,  
  
'Cause I'm still here.  
  
~~~  
  
"She is the teacher of Kamyia Kasshin-Ryu. Kamyia Kaoru. She'll be your sensei from today." He had taken me to a strange Dojo in the heart of Tokyo, slid opened the doors and pointed to the disheveled form of the young woman I had seen on the bridge who had been traveling with him. I was stunned.  
  
"Wait a second. Are you telling me to learn swords? And from this ugly?" I wasn't accepting this. I had no idea that that dirty girl knew swordsmanship. I could beat her up faster than I could shovel down a bowl of rice! What was that swordsman thinking! If he had this idea going in the right direction he would have offered his talents to me, not some girl swordsman wannabe!  
  
"Yep," Kenshin said, amused at the girl's reaction and mine. She didn't seem too happy to know I was going to be her student. I wouldn't blame her, since I could beat her easily. "The stage has been set," the swordsman snickered, patting me on the head like a child. He looked at me kindly and said finally, "The rest is up to you. You can be as strong as you want, Yahiko."  
  
For the third time that day, he had silenced me in awe of his words. His kindness and compassion, the qualities of a true samurai, helping others even if they do not wish to be helped, or don't think they need it.  
  
He was right. Now that I was freed from the bonds of my past I could live on and become the swordsman that I dreamed of becoming. Gaining the strength I needed to defend my family honor and help others do the same. To protect those oppressed by wicked men just as I was, and preventing the filth of the old era from rotting away the peace all the samurai of the revolution fought to preserve. Yes, this was my destiny. I would not be shoved away, kicked around or treated like dirt. I, Yahiko Myojin, would become the strongest Meiji Swordsman of all!  
  
~~~  
  
I'm the one,  
  
'Cause I'm still here.  
  
I'm still here.  
  
I'm still here.  
  
I'm still here.  
  
~~~  
  
~Owari~ 


End file.
